GameCop Vs LameCop Vs PsychoCop

In the past, GameCop vs. LameCop has been a feature where Anthony and I argue about video game issues, playing the role of either the GameCop or the LameCop as we do so. However, with the addition of a new GamerSushi team member, we’ve added another more absurd character to the bunch: Psycho Cop.

If you’re unfamiliar with this feature, we discuss gaming issues and we switch roles each time. The GameCop has your best interests as gamers at heart, while the LameCop is just what he sounds like: kind of a lamewad. Meanwhile, PsychoCop is a crazed, rabid forum troll that rants like a complete lunatic.

In this week’s edition, we not-so-calmly debate Day 1 DLC and Modern Warfare 2’s erasure of dedicated servers.


Issue 1

Many game companies are starting to release paid DLC on the day that a game comes out. The most recent example of this is Dragon Age: Origins. Some say this should have been included in the final package. Fair/foul?


GameCop: Eddy

If I’m going to be perfectly honest, I used to think that this was totally foul. I never understood why developers couldn’t just include the day 1 DLC on the game disc, rather than charging an extra few bucks for it. However, now that I have a friend in the gaming industry, I’ve heard a little more about how this all works. The thing about many video games is that the entire studio is under a huge time crunch to get the whole game delivered.

A game has to go gold (deliver for printing) months before it actually hits the shelves. It’s not until after this that developers are free to play around and come up with some cool new content for fans to enjoy on day 1. And since they don’t work for free, it only makes sense that we pay for it. Nobody’s making you buy the thing.

LameCop: Mitch

Hey, this is a nice surprise. I’ve already spent upwards of sixty hard earned cash-monies on your game, so I’d love to spend an extra ten or fifteen for a twenty minute level and a lame-ass pallet swap of an existing piece of in-game armor. Seriously, games are in development for years and then they go gold like what, two, three weeks in advance of ship? That’s plenty of time for you to stick that extra piece of downloadable content on the disk and stop the purposeless needling of the consumer.

Some people argue that games are made under a tight schedule, and that developers are just trying to give us extra incentive to buy the game new with day one DLC. That’s a total lie! They’re a bunch of suits, sitting in boardrooms cackling malevolently at all the suckers who bought Horse armor in Oblivion. As long as chumps like us keep lapping up every morsel that these money-grubbers drop, the game industry will keep churning out half-assed expansions and day one DLC just to make a quick buck. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a play-through of ODST that needs my attention.

PsychoCop: Anthony

Making games is not easy. Trust me, I have a cousin who knows a guy who once made his own version of Donkey Kong using only Legos and it was not as easy as it sounds. So sometimes when a game is finished and is ready to ship, the devs decide to take a break. And while they relax and unwind and date super models, they are hit with inspiration, like a muse mallet to the face. That’s where DLC comes from, kids.

There is a natural tendancy to hate anything that you have to pay extra money for, like when McDonalds tries to charge you when you want extra Sweet & Sour sauce or when the massuese needs an extra incentive to get to that happy ending. But what is the end result of these things? You get your Sweet & Sour, you get your happy ending and you get to bedazzle your horse or your Elf Noble with an awesome set of armor. And when you invite your poor cousin over on Christmas or whatever day you celebrate in December, he will be so jealous at the fact he could afford a $60.00 game and a $300.00 game system, but couldn’t scrap together enough money for that $1.99 Chain Mail of Awesome. And won’t that be the happiest day of your life?

Issue 2

Infinity Ward has ditched dedicated servers for the PC version of Modern Warfare 2 in exchange for a console style matchmaking service dubbed IWNET. Fair/foul?


GameCop: Mitch

Whoa, whoa, slow your roll, people. Sure, this may not seem like a great idea to most folks, but we have to remember that this is Infinity Ward. These are the guys that left the Medal of Honor series back when it was good and made a game that was superior. Every subsequent version of Call of Duty has just gotten better and better, and IW only has the series’ best interests at heart.

I can’t see why everyone is losing their minds over this issue. A matchmaking system isn’t going to equate to a poorer experience for the vast majority of CoD players, and I for one am intrigued about where this kind of system can go. You’re still getting Modern Warfare’s excellent multiplayer modes, along with the new SpecOps mode. A little trust can go a long way, and I’m sure Infinity Ward will find ways to make IWNet worth your time.

LameCop: Eddy

What the heck are we supposed to do then, Mitch, wait and see? We’re gamers! We can’t wait and see how this thing’s going to play- we need developers to cater to us now. How am I supposed to play Warcraft 3 Mods of MW2 without dedicated servers? How am I supposed to play in a Lego map or a Mario Kart race track while martyring guys? Answer me that, Mitch!

Infinity Ward is neglecting PC gamers with this one, and they’re going to be sorry when we put our money where our mouths (or online petition signing fingers) are. Why, instead, we’ll go play… uh… Well, screw it, we’ll just play Modern Warfare 2, but we don’t have to like it! They’re trying to make us console gamers, and everyone knows that console players don’t actually have fun playing video games.

PsychoCop: Anthony

Dedicated servers? What a joke! Servers have no loyalty, they are merely tools of whoever has control over them. You think a server is going to stay true to you? Just wait until Skynet gets ahold of your “dedicated” servers. Infinity Ward is trying to protect us all and this is how you repay them?

Look, I don’t want to sound like some sort of kook, but let’s examine the facts: Infinity Ward has made a military-training simulation that millions play on a near-constant basis. People adapt to tactics and adjust to other players styles. They are training us for a war! They know that when the shit starts flying, you won’t be able to choose who you fight next to, so you will just have to make do. And if the people you end up fighting with mesh, then you can “Party Up” and continue fighting on together. Infinity Ward has just saved humanity.

Oh and for those PC owners and their boycott: No one has cared about PC gaming for years. Welcome to reality. Life has passed you by. Now go get a console and join the “in crowd” or game makers will give you the consumer equivalent of a Rick Roll. Except they already gave you up and already let you down.


Now that you’ve seen the GameCop vs LameCop vs PsychoCop stance, what are your thoughts on these issues? Go!

Written by

I write about samurai girls and space marines. Writer for Smooth Few Films. Rooster Teeth Freelancer. Author of Red vs. Blue, The Ultimate Fan Guide, out NOW!

14 thoughts on “GameCop Vs LameCop Vs PsychoCop”

  1. This is one of the rare times I don’t agree with you guys.
    Now, before I start, I am NOT a PC fanboy. I think you guys are somewhat console biased.
    I don’t like IF’s decision about dedicated servers, as I won’t be able to play mods which is one of the best things about PC gaming.
    I strongly agree with your remarks about petitions though. They are stupid.
    Concerning Anthony’s remarks about PC gaming: Thousands, hell, MILLIONS of people care about PC gaming. Eddy, I think your comments on the dedicated servers are a little fake, to be honest. Have you ever played COD4 on the PC?

  2. Just a reminder that the various Cops are characters, and the person writing their parts probably doesn’t feel the same way.

    Eddy, Anthony and I (especially Anthony) were exaggerating for comedic effect in the LameCop/PsychoCop parts, so keep that in mind when you read our bits.

    As for being console biased, I’m a 50/50 split right down the middle. I play a lot of PC games and a lot of console games. Most people tend to play consoles in my experience, hence the tendency of most game sites to cater to that subset.

  3. Yeah, I mean, concerning the LameCop in the MW 2 discussion… I don’t actually feel that way. Just playing the character, there.

    I actually sympathize with PC gamers on the issue to an extent. I mean, having dedicated servers and playing mods, etc, is what makes PC gaming what it is, and why people find their identity in being exclusive to that vehicle of playing games. However, I do think that players need to calm down and see how IWNET plays before getting so up in arms about it.

  4. Cool articles.

    The only thing I dont like about the “no dedicated servers” issue is that my cousin and I like to have our 1 vs 1 sniper battles. We actually find EMPTY servers so that we can be alone to do so. With the Match Up crap we won’t be able to do that in MW2 (as far as it looks right now).

    I’m with Eddy on waiting to see how it turns out, but I really hope I won’t always be forced into playing with 10 on 10 crappy servers. I like my matches small.

  5. Do McDonalds charge for those S&S Sauces? Well, looks like I owe them quite a bit of money : /
    As a console gamer, I had little understanding of that whole server thing, but this shed some light on it. Also, provided he enjoys it, ALWAYS make Anthony Psyco Cop. I haven’t laughed at as GS article like that in ages!

  6. Issue: I don’t really mind Day 1 DLC, but if it costs a good deal of money for a small bonus mode or some extra content that’s not worth it, I kind of get irritated. It seems like either laziness, trying to get more money than the game is worth, but probably both. This is why games should be priced for their content. Fallout 3 deserves a $60 pricetag, but not ODST. ODST should cost $20 for the Campaign (it’s a good campaign and Bungie put a lot of effort and love into it, so $20 is worth it), $10 for Firefight because it doesn’t have matchmaking with shortens the longevity of the mode, and the maps and stuff that rose the price to $60 should be a totally separate DLC package of $10. It’s not worth forking over all that money for a fun little expansion that’s fun, but not worth $60. I’m keeping ODST for the Reach beta, and then I’m selling it.
    So more the hours you can get out of a product should equal how expensive it is, but of course Activision, EA, and Microsoft are all evil nickel-and-dimers who get extreme pleasure out of over-pricing everything and living on fan taxes. I understand if a developer wants to get money out of a new idea that fans will enjoy (like new map packs and gamemodes are great, even though sometimes they aren’t worth $10), but if you’re going to make the game $100 or more just to get the full content, that’s leaning towards bullshit. An incomplete game is not worth $60 + the several DLC packs that make the game “complete”; a great game with fulfilling gameplay, enough varied content, and perhaps a finished and good story if it has it is worth $60 + new maps and content that add to the experience and prolong the game’s longevity for fair prices is what makes a good game. Unfortunately not many game creators realize this. The fairer the deals, the more people will buy the game, getting you more profit and a larger community and therefore longevity.

    Issue 2: Nobody cares.

  7. Awesome, guys. Can’t say as I have too strong of an opinion on the topics at hand, though the IWNet business irks what’s left of my PC gamer sensibilities. I have to applaud the addition of PsychoCop, though – adds a nice touch of insane humor that really rounds out the format.

  8. [quote comment=”8851″]Cool articles.

    The only thing I dont like about the “no dedicated servers” issue is that my cousin and I like to have our 1 vs 1 sniper battles. We actually find EMPTY servers so that we can be alone to do so. With the Match Up crap we won’t be able to do that in MW2 (as far as it looks right now).

    I’m with Eddy on waiting to see how it turns out, but I really hope I won’t always be forced into playing with 10 on 10 crappy servers. I like my matches small.[/quote]

    On the consoles, you can have private parties, I am sure you can do that on the new PC Matchmaking system, as well.

  9. What makes you guys think that corporations care about their customers? All they care about is getting you to buy something, and it seems like they’re succeeding right now.

  10. Thanks for the update Anthony. I’m sure they’ll keep it in. Just pointing out that it’s really my ONLY worry about the Matchmaking system. I’m sure they’ll get it right.

    I know it’s a sad reality about PC Gamers. My real worry about PC being phased out due to piracy and lack of sales and a shift of interest in consoles is that Consoles have always represented (to me) the “jock” of gaming. PC Gamers are Geeks, I’m proud to be a geek… Most of the kids I know that own consoles don’t consider themselves geeks, or even gamers. They just have a box that helps to kill time.

    Video games started on PC’s for PC Geeks… As gaming moves more and more to “mainstream” and “hip”, the more I fear that really amazing games will slowly disappear and be replaced with soft, kid-friendly games that allow corporations to maximize their sales.

    Just like MaoiMeowi said, they dont care about us, they care about the bottom line (for the most part) just like every other business.

    I just don’t want to see the REAL artists get shoved aside by the garbage-pushers. But it’s been slowly happening for the past couple of years, just like the music industry. It’s just something we’ll have to face.

  11. @Julez

    I have an idea, lets get all the gaminer geeks at to make a game company that would make real games for real geeks!

    I do see what you mean though, most older games are a lot harder to play through than most modern games, even side scrolling games (which are now considered casual) used to be VERY hard (captain comic anyone?)

  12. I think I have to agree with Anthony on #2 because MW2 is probably going to be the most realistic game ever. Of all time. I mean, its the perfect training tool. Your sniper rifles are accurate standing up, you have crosshairs and perks, you rain blindly into the fray throwing grenades into enemy spawn – what could possibly get more realistic?

    BTW I <3 mah servers. CS:S FTW!

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