Phantasy Star Game Blog Part V: One Small Step For Man, One Giant Pain In The Ass For Anthony

noahAfter that horrific dream interlude, we head off to some cave where Noah is allegedly training and not building an ark of any kind. By the way: Worst. Random. Encounter. Rate. Ever. For reals, a battle ends, I scratch my nose and I get attacked again. You won’t believe what happened when I had to go pee. I have the console off right now and I think I can hear the battle music starting up!

So after navigating another cave where every single wall looks exactly the same (intelligent design?) I stumble upon, Noah, the blue-haired delight who tells me that he is just too busy training to help me save the universe! Training for what? What the hell could possibly be more important than this? Is there a 5K coming up? Are there intergalatic olympic games? Is Michael Phelps still around and if so, does he smoke Laconion Pot?

But what’s this? I have a letter from the Governor of Motavia? (He is a Motavian, BTW) and that’s all Noah needs to pull a Luke Skywalker circa Empire Strikes Back and quit his training and help us out. I guess if I had let Noah finish his training he would have started at a higher level than level 1, but somehow, I doubt it. Noah suggests we go to Gothic Forest and find Dr. Luveno. He fails to mention why we should find this guy or what the dress code is at Gothic Forest. I’m guessing black is encouraged.

We get to the forest and find the town of Gothic. The people here are surprisngly upbeat! I am warned to stay away from the tower nearby due to the magical beast that lives there. Little do these people know that telling me such a thing only ensures I will pay it a visit. Turns out that Dr. Luveno had a lab here and then he went bonkers and is now locked up in Triada Prison to the south. Prison Break!

A short walk later and we enter the prison and I release all the prisoners I can find. Some are pretty helpful, including one who informs me that the aforementioned tower is the lair of Medusa! Odin wets himself upon hearing this. There is even a giant tarantula who tells me of a substance called POLYMETERAL that dissolves anything except for Laconia. Interesting. Another guys tells me of a robot named Hapsby who was built to pilot a spaceship, but was abandoned in the town of Bortevo somewhere. Hapsby is also made out of Laconia. I’m sure this will come in handy later.

drluvenoDr. Wily! I mean, Dr. Luveno! Guess what! He refuses to help! Guess we should all go home. But I have come so far! So I ask again. No sale. One more time and as always in video games, the third time usually does it. Dr. Luveno agrees and asks for me to meet in him back in Gothic where he will help me, but only if I help him first. Typical. No word still on the Gothic dress code, but he is wearing white, so I think we are in the clear.

Find out later this week what sordid task Dr. Luveno has planned for me and what the hell else I have to do to get the freaking spaceship built in Part VI: The Strange Appetite of Dr. Mad

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Age: 34 PSN ID: Starkiller81. I've played games since before I can remember, starting with my dad's Atari and I haven't stopped yet. Keep them coming and I will keep playing them.

4 thoughts on “Phantasy Star Game Blog Part V: One Small Step For Man, One Giant Pain In The Ass For Anthony”

  1. I thought that was a chick in the picture. And the random encounters surpass even the damn Zubats in the pokemon games? Incredible if so, almost too hard to believe.

  2. Rofl.
    The creators of this game must have put all the SF movies they can think of to a blender, and mix the whole thing up.
    “Will it blend?”

  3. Dear god these are absolutely brilliant. I’m checking the site even more frequently ever since you started writing these.

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